This morning I found myself
ruffling through my mental drawer looking for a pencil and a pad to pen down
this story of a domestic goddess that I want to share with you. Why mental
drawer one might ask, well, as usual I was multi tasking: my hands were dicing
cucumbers for salad, my ears were pulled back waiting to hear the third whistle
of my pressure cooker so that I could turn off the gas, my eyes were trained on
the tapeli on the other burner of the gas to ensure that the milk didn't boil
over, my legs were taking turns at pushing my weight from one to the other
(it's a side effect of trying to control my bladder) and my mouth was muttering
and uttering profanities that I dare not pen down.
I had been up since the crack of dawn, actually much earlier, as I heard the loud crack when I was midway through preparing the tiffin for my daughters, and I hadn't been able to visit the privy and hence the battle of the bladder. Finally, my ears heard the shrill whistle, the hands quickly turned off both the burners of the gas, the legs together bore my weight as I ran to the loo to finish my unfinished task. Relieved, I was back in the kitchen, ticking off the mental list as I filled each small container: rotis, subzi, salad, sprouts, snack container for later with veggie appams ;now the second tiffin for my younger one: appams, chutney, dahi ; their breakfast: bournvita shake, pancakes......phew....done. Now back to my story….
Having bid adieu to my cook two months back, the kitchen had now again become my domain. Earlier I used to enter the kitchen only for the pleasure of baking or if the girls or husband dearest wanted something special cooked and not the mundane RSDB (rotli shaak dal bhaat), but now the afore mentioned mundane RSDB has also found a place in my mental to do list. I was ok with that as I do love to cook, it's just the clean up after cooking that I detest. (Let me be frank here, not just cleanup after cooking, but cleanup in general, I hate it. I hate washing dishes, I hate sweeping and mopping, I hate the laundry. I hate it all.)
Till last week, life was going well, kids taking pleasure in my cooking, husband dearest becoming extra romantic (let me confide in you that the way to a man's heart is indeed through his stomach), weekends became a pleasure ride of eating out as "mom needs a break from cooking" (aw, I'm so loved), kids gave me special head massages when their tiffin was extra yummy and showered me with warm hugs and sticky kisses after having their favourite pancakes for breakfast, and then to spoil the fun and take away the feeling that I was THE Domestic Goddess, my cleaner went AWOL.
I told myself that it's a test of my endurance that God has set and I should just show Him that I'm unbeatable, the will of God will not take you where the grace of God will not protect you...and so on and so forth I gave myself a pep talk and set about doing the needful. Husband dearest did counsel me to ask the neighbour's cleaner to come for 'rokdi' for a few days, but I'm TDG, out to prove my worth, why, pray why, would I ask for anyone else to intrude in my realm. I can do it, I will do it.
So for two whole days I attacked the hateful tasks with a smile on my face and a song on my lips, as I wanted my girls to see how much TDG was enjoying folding the laundry, doing the dishes, sweeping and mopping the house, so that they would come help me. But the literate smarties had read their Tom Sawyer, and my plans failed drastically. No help was coming my way, neither from my kids, nor from husband dearest. The smile on my face became a molar grinding mad axe murderer's insane grin and the songs on my lips became mutterings and grumblings of a mad woman. Alas! THE Domestic Goddess became THE Mad Muttering Domestic Witch!
The kids and husband dearest who used to shower me with love and envelop me in warm hugs, ran for shelter as soon as they saw TMMDW coming towards them waving a broom or shaking a duster and god forbid, sometimes doing both, the multitasker that she was. Hair uncombed, hanging in sweaty clumps, face speckled with dots of sweat, a cobweb or two hanging on her shoulder, plodding pair'o podia, frowning forehead and muttering mouth, TMMDW was a sight to behold. No romance for her, no warm hugs and no sticky kisses, no weekends out (who wants to be seen escorting TMMDW on a date). Not wanting to cross TMMDW, meals were gulped down without any urging, assigned tasks done without a reminder and school work done without getting up from their seat (no one wants TMMDW to get on their case). With the change in management, when TMMDW took over from TDG, the sweet words of yore had now become harsh shrill commands, which had to followed and followed now, or else, or else some cleaning task would be heaped upon your innocent unsuspecting head and you had to do it, no buts, no arguments.
Missing her sorely and wanting to restore TDG back to her rightful throne and oust TMMDW, the kids and husband dearest had a midnight conclave when TMMDW was snoring away her overworked, painfully tiring day. Gia: Should we send her to Nani's house, better still should we all move to Nani's house? Anoushka: Should we report to the police that the evil woman has kidnapped my mom? Brijesh: Should we go to Rajasthan and bring back Harishbhai (the AWOL cleaner)? What to do?
After a long night of whispered brainstorming session, my baby, little Gia came up with THE solution: 'I saw in the movie Frozen that only true love thaws a frozen heart.' Husband dearest and my elder daughter were gobsmacked. Lightning struck, oh my god, WE have created this monster like TMMDW. Of course, why didn't we think of it earlier? We could have saved ourselves (and let's not forget the poor woman) a lot of heart ache (and bone deep body ache for the poor woman). All we had to do was love her, help her and give her our unstinted support. So the three musketeers vowed to put this Eureka moment to good use.
The next morning TMMDW woke up to the smell of ginger tea, waddling to the kitchen (her tired aching feet were not ready to bear her sad weight), her astounded eyes saw the table set for breakfast, husband dearest was waiting to welcome her in the kitchen with a warm hug. The dough was kneaded and the veggies chopped. TMMDW rubbed her eyes to awaken herself from this pleasant dream that she was having, but it wasn't a dream! Her senses awakened with the strong smell of ginger, her eyes saw the prep done for the tiffin, her ears could hear some giggling and suddenly her person was enveloped by a huge group hug by the three musketeers. "We love you and we want to help you, what do you want us to do?" The ice around her heart cracked and melted away in the warmth of the loving hug. TDG broke through the shards of broken ice, and emerged in triumph over TMMDW. Indeed true love can thaw a frozen heart!
Moral: If you want your domestic goddess to remain the way she is, L O V E her and H E L P her when your cleaner goes AWOL.
